They call this the 20 Napkin Burger…but I only needed 12.

So, we’re hanging out at Craft Beer Market, the massive craft beer hall right downtown on Yonge St. I went here once before to see the wonderful Wizard of Gose, but this time I’m back for the burger. I’ve heard they’ve got a bunch of funky ones, but this one here’s their Marky Mark. Say hello to the 20 Napkin Burger, bro!

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Dude, this has gotta be the biggest burger I’ve had all month! You’ve got two burger patties, topped with bacon, some beer-can chicken and this messy cheese sauce oozing all over the place. Plus, they put another slider on top, in case you’re not quite full yet. They actually took a bunch of my napkins away before I could take this picture, but let’s just say it was pretty messy:

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Of course, you KNOW I didn’t scarf this down with a side of soda water… This ain’t Burgers, Bacon & Diet Coke, bro! Instead, I went with a Peachy Keen Milkshake IPA from the renegades of funkaliciousness at Lake of Bays:

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This boozy creamsicle was on my beer bucket list, bro! You’ve got a huge hit of peaches, with a slight, not too hoppy IPA finish. And there might not be any soft-serve in here, but it’s sure got a nice ‘n creamy head!

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Ojibway fry bread Indian tacos @ Pow Wow Café

Don’t get me wrong, there’s a whole lotta killer, real-deal, Bomb.co.mx tacos in Kensington Market—you’ve got places like Seven Lives, El Trompo and even a little stall that’s selling its own handmade tortillas. But while most of these spots specialize in Mexican tacos, this funky little joint called Pow Wow Café is slinging something completely different…

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They call these Indian tacos, and they’re straight up OG gangsta. You’ve got a rich ‘n meaty beef chili, with some kidney beans and chickpeas, served on top of this amazeballs bannock fry bread. Dude, it’s like Beignets Gone Wild in Flavourtown! And while you can’t eat it with your hands, you definitely won’t leave here feeling hungry, even if you’ve only had “one” taco, bro!!!

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Me gusto esto steak, bro!!!

So, we’re hanging out at Gusto 101, this funky fresh Italian joint just off King West on Portland St. This place has got an amazing rooftop patio, buck an ounce wines…and a pretty nice steak:

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OK, let’s break it down. You’ve got a nicely seasoned piece of dry aged centre cut striploin, with cherry tomatoes, red onions, garlic croutons and a lemon vinaigrette. And did I mention the side of Tuscan Fries?

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These spuds were hot n crispy, served up with a nice garlic aioli. I’d put that on a flip-flop!!!

Wacky Teppanyaki @ Yamato, bro!

Now, I don’t know about you, but to me, everything tastes better on a Hibachi. I mean, you could Hibachi me up some bean sprouts, tofu and daiyo cheese, and I’d probably still eat it off a flip-flop…but I think I’d rather stick to the basics. And at Yamato, this funky Japanese joint that’s been killin’ it and grillin’ it in Yorkville since 1983, they’ve got everything–chicken, shrimp, scallops, lobster, and at least two kinds of steak, all served up by a funky grillmeister who’s got the moves like Jagr…  Check out that sick dangle, son!!!

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Now, I don’t always eat veggies, but when you light ’em on fire, that’s a whole different ballgame… Now we’re cooking with propane–and propane accessories!

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Don’t get me wrong, these veggies were pretty tasty, but you know on Triple B we’re all about the meat. That’s why most of the Triple B Krew went with the Imperial Combo–chicken, shrimp AND filet mignon, bro!!!!

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Now, those shrimp were pretty Bomb.co.jp. Super hot and sizzly, straight offa Hibachi, and heading straight down my piehole!

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The chicken took the longest to grill, which gave it the most teriyaki flavour. I could probably pound, like, 20 pieces of this:

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But you know we’re just getting warmed up for the main event… Let’s get ready to sizzle!!!!

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Now, they cooked this filet in a whole buncha garlic butter, so it came out nice and zesty. Mine was quite a bit more than medium rare, but that’s not to say I didn’t scarf down every last juicy morsel:

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Now, I know what you’re thinking… After all that commotion back there, did he still have room for dessert? Well go ahead punk, make my cake!!!

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They call this the Blackout Chocolate Torte, or something like that. All I know is it’s got, like, infinity layers of chocolate, along with some berries and whipped cream… Dude, this is like an avalanche rolling down Flavourtown Mountain! I definitely did not have room for more dessert afterwards!!!!!

Hard shell tacos for one @ La Carnita

If Taco Tuesday isn’t my favourite day of the week, then it’s a close second behind Guy Fieri Fridays. So, we’re hanging out at La Carnita, this funky little joint in the Entertainment District, just down the street from Hooters. But why go for wings when you can eat tacos, bro? And on Tuesday, they’ve got this sickass special–all the hard shell tacos you see here (and then some) for 28 bucks.

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Now, they say it’s supposed to serve two people, but I’ve eaten more tacos than that more than once, so ocho tacos es no problemo, hermano! They actually give you enough fillings for 10 tacos–these shells are super-tiny–but then they charge you a buck per extra shell, so I just made some taco salad instead:

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Basically, I just threw whatever I had left over into the pan. You’ve got some chorizo, lettuce, a little pico, sour cream and guac. I had to eat it with a small serving spoon, but you know I ate it all, bro–and still had room for dessert!

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Next door at Sweet Jesus, they call this Rocky Road Rage, and it’s so outrageous, I almost crashed the Camaro, bro! You’ve got chocolate soft serve, marshmallows, chocolate sauce, walnuts, cashews & Oreo cookie crumbles, all served up in a cone–shut the front, back and side doors, My Little Brony!!!!

Beef brisket bacon breakfast burger @ Craft Brasserie

Now, I don’t always get up in time for brunch, but when I heard that Craft Brasserie was smoking their own bacon, curing their own peameal and making a breakfast burger outta beef brisket, I figured I had to come check it out. This Liberty Village basement brewpub has also got 120 craft beer taps, including a whole buncha limited edition special guest beers. So basically, I’m gonna be moving to Liberty Village tomorrow.

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Dude, this burger is so far outta bounds, it ran into the stands and took out an ice cream man! You’ve got a nice, thick and juicy brisket patty, topped with smoked Gouda, onion rings and that Bomb.ca bacon. Dude, I would braid that bacon into a flip flop, put it on my feet, walk 5,000 miles, then eat it…and it would still taste good!!!!

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Of course, one does not go to a funky joint like the Craft Brasserie and order a chocolate milk. So, we’re starting off with this Bavarian Breakfast Wheat beer, a strong Hefeweizen from Silversmith in the Niagara region. It’s a bit like Blanche de Chambly, but a little less fruity, and a lot more alcoholy.

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But even after pounding a few of these, I’ve still got room for some liquid dessert. This breakfast stout from Town Brewery, straight outta Whitby, is called Breakfast at Timothy’s. And it’s kinda like drinking coffee…if coffee was a beer.

Chowin’ down in East Chinatown @ AAA Bar

Now, you know there’s lotsa great BBQ joints all over this city, but I did not expect to find one in East Chinatown. So, we’re hanging out at AAA Bar at Gerrard and Broadview, right across from a Chinese grocery store. But there ain’t no chickity China, the Chinese chicken here, Barenaked Brodies! Instead, they’re serving up the classics like beef brisket, dry rub ribs, pulled pork…and even chicken and waffles!

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But you know that right here on Triple B, we’re all about that beef. Their beef brisket was more au jus than Texas BBQ, mind you. Good thing it came with a slice of bread on the side–now where’s the beef dip?

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This coleslaw was pretty Crunchasaurus Rex. They give you a big bowl of it for just four bucks, so I probably had at least 2-3 servings of veggies today…

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Now, the mac and cheese wasn’t exactly cheesetastic, but this Bomb.ca smoked sausage more than made up for it! You’ve got quite a bit of kick from the holla-atcha-penos, and then some oozy queso in every bite. It’s like the Tag Team Champions of Flavourtown Sausagefest!!!!

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Of course, you can bet your bottom dollar there ain’t nobody drinking Bud Light at this backyard cookout. This place has actually got Alberta Genuine Draft on tap–that’s right, all the way out in Toronto–but we’re getting into the good stuff… Big Rock Traditional. This malty brown ale goes pretty darn good with some BBQ sausage, Stampede Broseph!!!!