One night in Bangkok Garden, and the world’s your oyster…

Now, I’ve never been to Bangkok, but I often rock out to Murray Head’s Greatest Hits on cassette when I’m cruisin’ in the Camaro, so there’s that. And there just so happens to be this funky little joint downtown, just a go-go dance away from Yonge and Dundas, that’s been serving up real-deal Thai food since the early 80’s… Cue the synth flute solo, cuz we’re spending one night in Bangkok Garden, bro!

Of course, if we’re spending one night in Bangkok, you can bet your bottom baht that we ain’t drinking Coors Light! This here’s Singha beer, the original Thai lager since 1933. If you take Molson Canadian, and actually add flavour, it would taste a little something like this. And if you’re gonna crush some spicy Thai food, you might wanna chug a few of these brewskis, bro!!!

Now, this place has got some seriously spicy dishes with some totally awesome names — we’re talking Demon’s Dare (stir-fried chili beef), Neptune’s Nemesis (deep-fried fiery chili fish), Totsakan’s Revenge (red curry fish) and Warrior’s Beef Curry…it’s like their menu was written by Kerry King or something! But since the Camaro doesn’t run on fart juice, I went for something a little less spicy — the grilled seafood satay:

OK, now let’s break it down. You’ve got shrimp, mussels and squid…all grilled up and served on a stick — which was also the name of my Meat Loaf cover band in college (I was the varsity tackle). It comes with a side dipping sauce that actually had quite a bit of a kick, and then you’ve got a bed of rice to soak it all up. All that’s missing is the oysters!