Greedo goes to Canoe…hilarity ensues!

Now, in all my years of eating in this city, I had never been to Canoe. I did have sex in a canoe once–it tasted like Bud Light. But I’d never been to the restaurant at the top of the TD Tower with the majestic views of the city skyline…until now.

life_in_the_clouds_IPA (10)

So, I figured if I’m gonna be way up high, I’d better be drinking Life in the Clouds, this strong, hazy, double dry-hopped IPA from Collective Arts. If you’re a fan of unfiltered citrus beers, then this one’s for you. And hey, some of the wines here were like 90 bucks for a thimble…so I figured I’d better stick to beer.

smoked_boudin_noir+sweetbreads (15)

So we’re starting off with this dish of smoked boudin noir sausage, Kentucky-fried sweetbreads with risotto, walnuts and morel mushrooms. I knew I had to order this when I saw ’em bring it to another table under a glass dome with all the smoke. Now, I don’t always eat sweetbreads, but if you Kentucky fry that shit, I could slam, like, seven of these…and still have room for some shrooms:

smoked_boudin_noir+sweetbreads (22)

Now, for the main course, I was torn between the Tamarack Lamb and the Quebec Red Stag. But dude, how often do you get deer…from Quebec???

quebec_red_stag_canoe (12)

This baaaad, baaaad venison was like a Bon Jovi keyboard solo in Flavourtown! Deer was cooked to a perfect medium rare, you’ve got like one or two potatoes, a small sausage roll, some peanut-butter jelly sauce…and a lot of cabbage. Like, a whole lotta cabbage–enough that you almost need a third piece of meat to go with it. Dude, I did not come here for the cabbage…but of course, I still ate it all, anyways:

quebec_red_stag_canoe (28)(This might be the most unclean cleaned plate I’ve ever seen…)

chocolate_forest_stout_cake (3)

Of course, even after all that cabbage, you KNOW I still had room for dessert, bro! But I gotta say, when I ordered the Chocolate Forest Stout Cake, this is NOT what I was expecting. I guess you’ve got some cake crumbles in there, with some marshmallow, chocolate pudding, chocolate chunks and then this chestnut/gingerbread ice cream. But I’d much rather have a great big piece of real man’s cake, the way they do at Wildfire Steakhouse, son!!!

Now, I gotta say, I know a couple people who’ve been to Canoe before, and they told me that I’d hafta stop for a burger on the way home cuz I’d still be hungry. But I can tell ya that after an appetizer, main course and a dessert…I did not have room for an after-dinner burger. Maybe it’s because I filled up on the free bread and butter, though?

canoe_bread+butter(Mmm, sourdough…)

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