CHITOWN CHOWDOWN: I survived Jeppson’s Malort!!!

Ever had a Chicago handshake, bro? It’s when you do a shot of Jeppson’s Malort, chased with a can of Heileman’s Old Style. And after the Cubs beat Pittsburgh 21-0, I partook in this Chicago tradition at nearby watering hole Murphy’s Bleachers.

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Now, Jeppson’s Malort has a reputation that precedes it, with people saying that it tastes like burning hair, earwax, and lots of other not-so-good things. I first heard about this terrible concoction several years back…so now that I’m here in Chicago, naturally I had to try it.

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Maybe it was because I was preparing myself for it to taste terrible…but I found that it wasn’t as bad as they say. Don’t get me wrong, it burns like straight fire going down, with a little bit of spice…but it did NOT make me toss my cookies or anything. Just like harkarl, the Icelandic rotten shark that freaked everyone out, I found that Malort was not nearly as bad as they say. With that said, I do not see any need to drink it ever again. ;P

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The second part of the Chicago handshake is Old Style, a classic local lager that was around the second-last time the Cubs won the World Series. Mind you, I think I’d rather have another shot of Malort than drink another one of these watery beers, bro… Let’s just say if you’ve had Kokanee, you’ve basically had Old Style before.

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