Going on a Seattle pub crawl (cuz Russell Wilson sucks balls!)

^^(This was never supposed to happen…)

Now, we’re longtime Seahawks fans right here on Triple B, so when Russell Wilson whined his way outta town, got traded to Denver, and then was scheduled to play the Hawks on Monday Night Football to start the season, you KNOW we had to be there, bro! And suffice to say this is not a game we wanna watch while sober. So before the game started, we made our way down the Link light rail line, grabbing a couple drinks at each stop along the way…

We’re starting off at Big Time Brewery & Alehouse, Seattle’s OG brewpub, brewing it up and pouring it fresh in the U District since 1988. This place only has its own beers on tap, and with 13 to choose from, I could be here all day — if it wasn’t so far away from the stadium.

But we’re starting off with an Irish breakfast smoothie in the form of their Coal Creek Porter. A nice, chocolatey beer checking in at 5.5%. Nothing wrong with that at all. (It’s probably a safer bet for breakfast than the 8.5% S’moredor Imperial Stout.)

But alas, one can not drink all these beers on an empty stomach, so I’m going to town on these pork verde tacos, bro! Pork is braised in porter (not the one I just drank), and they put so much meat on here that you need two tortillas to handle it. You’ve also got some salsa verde, onions and Mexican cheese — but the pork is definitely the star of the show.

From there we’re going for something summery and fruity — Passionfruit Blondeshell Ale. Believe or not, but I’ve had a few passionfruit beers before…and this one comes the closest to capturing that passionfruity flavour, bro!!!

So, we headed a couple stops down the line to Capitol Hill to check out this funky little brunch spot called Americana Restaurant. (It looked like the only place in the area that served beer and was open around lunchtime.) Cuz with all the drinking I’m about to do, I figured I could use a second breakfast, bro.

Now, while they had Elysian Space Dust IPA on tap, the tap wasn’t working that day or something, so that’s why I ended up drinking a Blue Moon. Hey, it’s not bad for a brunch beer — it basically tastes like orange juice, bro.

But the main reason we’re here is for the lamb burger. A nice, thick, juicy patty, served simply with tomato and arugula. It comes with tzatziki on the side, but you’re gonna wanna put it on top of the burger. Man, this stuff even tastes good on sweet potato fries — which automatically come with the burger.

We’re hanging out at The Yard House, this funky joint across the street from the Westlake Center in Downtown Seattle. Apparently, this place is a chain with locations across the country…but with 130 beers on tap and classic rock all night long, I’m not opposed to checking this chain out. Man, I was only here for about an hour, but I heard them play Africa by Toto twice…

We’re starting out with a Dogfish Head 60 Minute IPA — one of those legendary American craft beers that you can never find up here in Canada. Nice, crisp and only slightly hoppy, it’s super-crushable at 6%.

Wasn’t planning on getting food, but when I saw the Jumbo Bavarian Pretzel on the menu, you KNOW I needed one of these in my life, bro! This bad boy was coming in so hot, I couldn’t even touch it, but once I finally ripped in, it was worth the burn. Comes with a whole buncha beer cheese and just a bit of Dijon mustard — I’d say the cheese to mustard ratio was about right.

Here’s another beer you won’t find north of the border — Rogue’s Nitro Chocolate Stout. Smooth and creamy like a Guinness, but with a richer, more chocolatey taste — and noticeably stronger at 5.8%.

At this point, it’s about 90 minutes till kickoff. We’re getting off at Pioneer Square, where all the bars are pretty packed. So we stopped into a place called Shawn O’Donnell’s, where the bar was standing room only.

Didn’t feel like Guinness after that Nitro Chocolate Stout, so I went with a Drubru Peach Sour. Light, tangy and fruity…this should tide me over until kickoff.

Manny’s Pale Ale is a Seattle classic. Pretty sure I had one of these at a bar after the Seahawks season opener in 2010 — you couldn’t get craft beer at the stadium in those days. This one’s more like an English pale ale than an American IPA… not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Now, never in my wildest dreams did I actually expect Seattle to win this game. I was just hoping they could keep it close, so I could keep booing Russell Wilson until the end. But with the Hawks up 17-13 at the half, I started thinking they might have a chance. And with the two teams combining for just 3 points in the second, 17-13 turned into a 17-16 win. Uglier than this Tim Tebow tattoo, but we’ll take it!

(This sign is both mathematically and metaphorically accurate. Better luck in 2026, Russ!!!)