Dude, we’re hanging out at Leña, this funky South American joint inside The Bay, right on Yonge St in the heart of downtown Flavourtown. This place is serving up all kinds of funky brunch, like a brisket burger, breakfast beef empanadas and this South American cowboy’s desayuno, The Full Gaucho:
OK, now let’s break it down. You’ve got these super-runny herb fried eggs, two kinds of pork, with blood sausage AND pork shoulder bacon, mushrooms, onions, tomatoes, a couple pieces of warm flatbread and some tasty griddled taters — dude, this is body by griddled taters! But I gotta say, the blood sausage is what makes it:
Now, this sausage is definitely a different texture than you get from one made of meat. But it’s got a nice spice to it, bit of kick from the onions, and goes great with eggs and taters. Man, I don’t even need a fork — I would eat this off a flip-flop!!!
Of course, even after eating all that grub, you KNOW we’ve still got room for a plate fulla churros, bro! You gotta love deep-fried dough, sprinkled with icing sugar, and then a whole teacup of chocolate for dipping… Dude, I could totally chug that teacup of chocolate, son!!!
Now, if I was to build a culinary empire around just one ingredient, it would hafta be bacon–cuz hey, it takes several great ingredients to make a burger, right? Now, I’ve already been to Bacon Nation a buncha times, but there’s this funky little joint on Ossignton where they don’t just put bacon in every dish, they build every dish around bacon!
That’s right, at Rashers, they’ve got no less than a dozen different bacon sammies to choose from. And while I kinda just wanted to drop 120 bucks and order one of everything, I figured I had to go with their take on a traditional diner classic: the BLT. But this ain’t just any old BLT, cuz it’s got house-made beer mayo, bro!!!
OK, now let’s break it down. For starters, they put this thing on a warm ciabatta bun–there ain’t no dry white toast here, Elwood! The lettuce is fresh and crispy, you get a nice juiciness from the tomato, and I could probably pound a pint of that beer mayo, bro! But the star of the show has gotta be the bacon. Just look at how thick it is! And they cook it just right, so that it’s not too crispy, but not too chewy either. I’m trying to think of a time that I had a better bacon sandwich…but I’m drawing a blank. Hey, you know what they say: so much bacon, such little brain cells, broseph!!!!
So today, the weather was pretty shitty around lunch time. Y’know, it was all cloudy ‘n rainy ‘n shit. Today was not a day to be eating ice cream—but a pretty decent day for a grilled cheese sandwich:
OK, let’s break it down. The bread is grilled perfectly, nice and crispy. You’ve got lotsa ooey, gooey, local white cheddar oozing all over the place…but the bacon is what makes it. Nice and thick, but still with a nice chew. All that’s missing is the tomato soup!
OK, so here’s the deal. Sometimes, after chowing down on three kinds of BBQ, lobster nachos and a 67-ounce steak, I need something light and leafy, that actually has vegetables. But hold the queeno bro, cuz this ain’t no health food:
What we’ve got here is some chicken breast, cucumbers, swiss cheese, a hard-boiled egg in the middle and about three full slices of bacon. Cuz hey, the only way I’ll eat lettuce is if it’s touching bacon. Now, I’ve had some manly salads in my day, but this one’s definitely right up there. I’d even eat it off a beach sandal!
So, check it out. There’s this funky joint at the corner of Queen and Spadina called Bacon Nation. They started out as a food truck, but this pork palace has been in business since 2014. They only serve breakfast and lunch though, so don’t even bother coming for dinner!
And man, their breakfast menu is pretty badass. They’re serving up a breakfast BLT, a back-bacon eggs benny, breakfast poutine…oh, and this beefy bacon monstrosity, the Wake & Bacon Burger:
So, what we’ve got here is a flame-grilled burger, topped with two ginormous slices of bacon, cheddar cheese, and a sunny-side-up egg. Served with a side of homefries…and a salad, for some reason. Dude, this dish is brunchtastic! You’ve got the egg running all over the place, bacon the size of a baby’s forearm, super-melty queso, all served up in a fresh-baked bacon brioche bun. That’s right, even the bun has bacon in it! The only thing that would make this plate better is if they replaced the side salad with a side of bacon. C’mon, this is body by bacon, bro!
(Originally written June 13, 2012)
CTV News is reporting that Burger King is set to introduce the bacon sundae, a tasty treat comprised of “rich and creamy vanilla Burger King soft serve ice cream, drizzled with chocolate fudge, caramel and topped with bacon crumbles” with “a thick-cut, hardwood smoked bacon garnish.” Seems to me that someone at CTV really loves him some BK—or they simply cut-and-pasted from the company’s press release.
This “sweet and savoury dessert” is also good for your health—if you think that being fat is a good thing. “The sundae clocks in at 510 calories, 18 grams of fat and 61 grams of sugar.” I think that’s more than Nicole Richie ate all day…
And while this mecca of bacony goodness goes for a mere suggested retail price of $2.49, it looks like you’ll hafta cross the border to get it. For the moment anyways, the bacon sundae is only available in the States. Hey Rob Ford, instead of letting city council pass more “dumbest things they’ve done,” how about ramming through a bill to make the bacon train stop in Toronto in time to beat the summer heat?