Tag Archives: Better Than Corona

20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 9. Hail Saison

If there’s one local craft brewery that’s making the most evil, blasphemous, unholy beers in town, it’s gotta be Blood Brothers. Whether it’s the deception of their White Lies sour, the darkness of their Black Hand stout, or their awesomely named light beer — Blood Light! — they’ve definitely made a deal with the devil or something. Hey, if that’s what it takes to get us out of this mess…

9. Hail Saison

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Now, this hazy beer is brewed with the most evil of melons — honeydew — which means it’s pretty much a black mass in a glass. Not as sour or bitter as many saisons, it goes down nice ‘n easy…

I had this beer on draught at this funky little Parkdale dive called Escape Goat — which probably won’t have reopened by the time you read this. 😦

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 8. Peachy Keen Milkshake IPA

Right now, my milkshake isn’t bringing any boys to the yard — Ontario has banned all large gatherings of over 50 people. And isn’t that just peachy… But who’s to say we can’t enjoy a milkshake IPA from Lake of Bays?

8. Peachy Keen Milkshake IPA

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Milkshake IPAs are one of the few non-vegan beers…which makes me wanna drink them even more? This particular one packed a lotta peaches and some hops into a nice, creamy finish. And speaking of non-vegan, I slammed a couple of these while polishing off the notorious 20 Napkin Burger at Craft Beer Market, bro!!!

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 7. Iron City Light Mango

I had this beer one time at an airport in Pittsburgh. You know airports, those things we used to travel from, back when people were still allowed to get on a plane? OK, so this beer wasn’t very good…but it still tasted better than Corona!

7. Iron City Light Mango

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Remember when Bud Light was rolling out all those silly fruit-flavoured beers, before it switched to seltzer? Well, it looks like they had some competition in Pennsylvania, where all liquor stores are now closed, from this local brew by the Pittsburgh Brewing Company. I’ve had I.C. Light at a baseball game before, and it wasn’t very good — adding mango to the mix didn’t make it taste much better. But, if you’re a fan of Orange Crush…this might be the light beer for you.

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 6. Rainbow in the Dark

At a time like this, I find myself asking WWDD — “What would Dio do?” Would he stand up and shout, or be the last in line? After all, the world is full of kings and queens, who blind your eyes and steal your dreams… It’s Heaven and Hell!

But with everyone left on their own like a rainbow in the dark, I think this is the beer he probably would drink.

6. Rainbow in the Dark

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This winter rye IPA from Barrie’s Redline Brewhouse (best known for its Clutch APA) has an evil 6.66% ABV, but still packs enough hops for a nice, fruity finish. It may not be in season, but if you’re in the area, you can still grab cans to go and even order food from their takeout menu.

Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll be able to go back to Beerocracy, the funky craft beer bar where me ‘n the Triple B Krew drank all their Rainbows, until this shutdown comes to an end — and there’s no sign of that morning coming. 😦 😦 😦

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 5. La Bamba

Yesterday, temperatures got up to 18 degrees in Toronto, which would have been a great time to enjoy a nice, cold beer on a patio…except for Coronavirus. Instead, our countdown continues with another summery lager from the great state of Maryland:

5. La Bamba

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Para bailar La Bamba, all you need is a pint glass, hermano! This Mexican-style cerveza was the feel-good hit of last summer at Olde Mother Brewing Co., a funky little brewery with a killer taproom in downtown Frederick, MD. This beer is like a combination of the second and third entries on our list — it’s brewed with lime juice and poblano peppers, so it’s both bitter AND spicy!

Not sure if they’re bringing it back this year, but if you happen to be in the area, their taproom is still open for to-go cans and crowlers

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 4. Landshark Lager

With all the bars and restaurants shut down across Ontario, I’m not wasting away in Margaritaville — or anywhere else, for that matter. But until life returns to normal, I’d rather chug this Island Style Lager than even take a sip of Corona…

4. Landshark Lager

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I’m really just a dolphin, ma’am! This light, easy-drinking, Jimmy Buffet branded beer tastes kinda like the Caribbean — as opposed to Corona, which tastes like the urinal at a Taco Bell. And you can actually buy it at The Beer Store…if they haven’t run out already!

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 3. Mango Habanero Oberon

No word as to when bars might reopen after Coronavirus in Ontario, but I’m guessing that we won’t be able to enjoy any patio beers until after the start of patio season (which wasn’t until May last year). In the meantime, we’re still counting off 20 beers that are better than Corona — both the virus, and the beer!

3. Mango Habanero Oberon

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Coming in from just south of the border, this pale wheat ale from Michigan’s legendary Bell’s Brewery kicks it up a notch with a hit of habanero peppers. If you’re eating spicy Mexican food, you might wanna avoid this one, as it won’t cool you down at all. In fact, after slamming this spicy brewski at Mudgie’s Deli in Detroit, I needed to order some dessert to cool off my face!!!

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 2. Numero Uno Mexican Lager

In case you missed it yesterday, we are counting down 20 beers that are better than Corona to get us in the drinking mood once all the bars in Ontario reopen after the Coronavirus shutdown. Of course, they haven’t actually told us when that might be — hopefully this countdown doesn’t go to 100!!!

2. Numero Uno Mexican Lager

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You know how every time Tony Romo does a cringey commercial, a Corona gets its lime? Well, Numero Uno Mexican Lager from Maryland’s Flying Dog Brewery doesn’t need a lime — it’s brewed with agave and lime zest, so the flavour’s already in the beer, bro!

I pounded a few of these, along with a triple-decker BBQ sandwich and some bacon cheddar pulled pork fries at Black Hog BBQ, this funky joint in downtown Frederick, last summer. Man, I miss BBQ already!!!

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 1. Guinness

Coronavirus has shut down all bars and sit-down restaurants in Ontario as of midnight this morning, making it the worst viral outbreak named after a shitty beer since Saskatchewan came down with a bad case of Pilsner Fever on November 29, 2009. This really changes the game for Triple B, with funky joints all over this province closing their doors for now, and we don’t even know when they’ll be open again…

We’ll still be ordering takeout and delivery (Dude, this is body by takeout and delivery!), but in the meantime, we’re counting down 20 beers that are better than Corona until we can actually go out and crush some killer Burgers, Bacon and Beer again!

1. Guinness

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You KNOW I wish I was in some Irish pub slamming pints of Guinness for St. Patty’s today, bro! Especiallt at a funky joint like Bushwaller’s in Frederick, Maryland, where they’ve got a killer corned beef Reuben omelette and an Old Bay-seasoned crab dip pretzel. Did I mention all their Irish beers are 2 bucks off on Sundays???

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