Tag Archives: craft beer

PATIO LIT EATS: Patio beers & pizza @ King Taps

It seems like there’s two kinds of patios in Toronto right now — the ones that are all booked up for weeks, and others that are first-come, first-serve. That’s why King Taps, this funky craft beer joint in the Financial District, is smarter than your average joint.  Y’see, they’re only doing same-day resos — which means I was online right at midnight to snag a primo spot for the Triple B Krew last weekend, bro!!!!

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Dude, I’ve been to King Taps a couple times before, so I KNOW they’ve got good beer here. The selection wasn’t quite as good as I remembered, but their rotating tap list is still pretty solid. This here’s Solaris White Peach Ale, a hazy wheat beer from Phillips Brewing in Victoria, BC. Super-crushable at 4.3%, and it sure tastes peachy!!!

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Now, when it comes to food, if there’s one thing this joint is known for — besides the $30 double cheeseburger with beef short rib on top — it’s pizza. And when it comes to their pizza, this here’s The People’s Champion. The Stinging Bee rumbles in the jungle with soppressata salami, kalamata olives, a whole lotta mozza, and some honey on top, for just that little hit of sweetness. Who needs to float like a butterfly when you can shove this pizza down your piehole, son????

TORONTO’S TOP TAKEOUT: $200 steak dinner, delivered!!!

Uber Eats gave me a code for 25% off this week, so I was looking for the most expensive, decadent meal I could order for delivery…and I think I found it. Jacobs & Co. Steakhouse is one of the classiest steak joints in Toronto, with premium cuts of Japanese beef that can set you back four bills, bro! Now, they weren’t delivering the (really) good stuff — their priciest cut was an 8oz Wagyu tenderloin from Australia for $168. Throw in a couple of sides, and let’s just say I saved 48 dollars today. 😉

My order arrived in about 35 minutes, and the aluminum containers kept everything nice and warm, so I definitely can’t complain! And who needs fine china when you’ve got heavy metal, bro???

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Now, the first thing I thought when I took everything out of the delivery bags was “Man, these mushrooms smell amazing!” You’ve got a nice mix of roasted ‘shrooms, with some butter and chives, making this the perfect steak sidekick in Flavourtown!

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But make no mistake, this steak was the star of the show. The baseball-sized sirloin melts like butter and cuts with a butter knife, Bro-an Adams! Now, I wouldn’t normally put any sauce on such a great steak, but a bit of that chimichurri and a couple dabs of horseradish really kicked it up a notch!

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When it comes to the other sides, well, the duck fat fries were tasty — sorta like an elevated Swiss Chalet — but what really makes this dinner was something I didn’t even hafta pay for…the real-deal bread rolls!

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With a meal like this, you really don’t wanna fill up on bread, but I just had to eat both of these — they’re like muffins meets Yorkshire pudding in Flavourtown! And that chive butter was super legit… I’d put that on a flip-flop!!!

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Now, some people might drink wine with a nice meal like this, but you KNOW I’m all about the beer, bro! So I’m washing it down with a Unify or Die, this funky spiced stout from Blood Brothers, one of my favourite local breweries. (Dude, they’ve even got an Iron Maiden beer!!!) This brew’s got the silky smooth body of a Guinness, but with a lot more vanilla, and a bit of cinnamon, for that extra kick. And man, is there a better-named beer for this whole pandemic thing???

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Now, even though I saved over 48 bucks on this order, after taxes, fees and a reasonable tip, I still ended up dropping just over 200. But man, it was money well spent, son! If I ever sign a big NHL contract or something, I KNOW where I’m going for dinner!!!!

 

TORONTO’S TOP TAKEOUT: BBQ platter for two (but really just for one…)

Dude, I’ve been wanting to check out Meat & Pie Co., this funky halal BBQ joint that’s serving up two of my favourite things — meat AND pie — down on King St, where the Lone Star Grill used to be, for a little while now. Of course, they’ve been closed due to COVID-19…but on weekends, they’re doing free delivery on orders of 50 dollars or more.

Now, it’s not hard to spend 50 bucks on BBQ ’round these parts — a couple meats, a couple sides, and you’re usually set. I wanted to try a few of the best things they had to offer, so I ordered the 2 Person Platter. But the thing is, due to social distancing, there’s only one of me to eat it…

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Dude, this was so much food that I had to put it out on a cutting board, cuz I didn’t have a big enough plate! You’ve got a smoked half chicken with Tandoori seasoning, two big, thick slices of brisket — one on the leaner side, the other more medium — two pieces of jalapeno cheddar cornbread, a tin of mac ‘n cheese, a side of pickles and two little containers of BBQ sauce…and did I mention there’s pie for dessert???

OK, now let’s break it down…

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Now, the brisket wasn’t quite fork-tender — the leaner piece was more like eating steak — but it still had a nice, smoky flavour, good texture and a nice chew. It goes great with the crunch of the pickle, and while I don’t normally like sauce on BBQ, the tangy, smoky sauce on the side was pretty darn good for dipping!

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But the real star of the show has gotta be that smoked Tandoori chicken. Bird’s nice and moist, with just a bit of a kick… I could eat that all day, son!!!

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Mac ‘n cheese was nice and creamy, with a good breadcrumb crust — although it didn’t stay as warm as the meat did. And the cornbread was everything you’d expect, with little chunks of jalapenos and cheese…I can’t complain at all.

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Of course, because the name of the blog isn’t Burgers, Bacon & Unsweetened Tea, we had to wash this all down with an ice cold beer. This here’s a Firefly, a red currant habanero coconut gose from Half Hours on Earth, this craft brewery in the small town of Seaforth, ON…about an hour west of Kitchener. Now, the last habanero beer I had was pretty spicy, but that’s not the case here; if anything, I get more red currants, along with the slightly sour taste of the gose, which goes quite well with the heavy meat platter — and you KNOW I polished it all off, bro!!!!

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Aaaaand after clearing the table, I’ve still got room for dessert…

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This homemade apple pie was absolutely delectable! You’ve got a ton of apples in here, with some cinnamon, sugar, and a nice crunchy crust. And it’s about the right size after such a big meal — I probably couldn’t have eaten any more pie if I wanted to, bro! This also goes well with a nice glass of wine…

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…except that’s not wine, it’s another beer, bro! This Delirious Night sour DIPA, also from Half Hours on Earth, is brewed with Pinot Noir grape juice, Madagascar vanilla and milk sugar. It smells like a whole barrel full of hops, and is surprisingly strong, at 7%. I actually got both of these beers delivered from The Rosedale Diner, which makes this a delivery double down in Flavourtown!!!!

 

20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 18. Dead Rise Old Bay Gose

Now, this has gotta be one of the crazy, zaniest, what-the-funk-where-they-thinking beers I’ve ever chugged — I’m glad I didn’t drink more than a sample cup! But you know what? I’d still rather drink this beer than Corona, which just shut down production today due to Coronavirus. It’s like raiiiiin on yer wedding day, Alanis Bro-risette!!!

18. Dead Rise Old Bay Gose

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Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed my tour of Flying Dog Brewery in Frederick, Maryland last summer. I got to see where all the magic happens, then, at the end, there was a free flight waiting for me in the tap room! Now, I actually like a lot of their beers — Doggie Style, Raging Bitch, Brut Reynolds IPA…but when I tried the Dead Rise Old Bay Gose, I got a little bit more than I bargained for!

Y’see in Maryland, they put Old Bay on everything — crab cakes, crab dip, crab fries…I even had it on chicken wings. But brewing a beer with Old Bay seasoning in it, where you actually taste the saltiness, was no bueno, bro! Next time, I think I’ll stick with their Ain’t Nothing But a G Thang hazy IPA!!!!!

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 17. Hazed and Confused

Man, if Dazed and Confused, my favourite Matthew McConaughey movie, happened today, it would totally suck! They’d be like “Parties at the Moontower are cancelled until further notice. Aerosmith’s concert this summer will be rescheduled for next year.” It would be a lot cooler if you didn’t, bro!!!

But what doesn’t totally suck is this hazy Vermont-style IPA, which happens to be named after my favourite Matthew McConaughey movie…

17. Hazed and Confused

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This hazy, juicy beer has a whole lotta hops, with a nice, citrusy finish. They had it on tap two summers ago at Poor Romeo, this funky 70’s rock bar in Gerrones that has a portrait of Phil Lynott right next to its beer list! Man, I really hope that place reopens before the end of summer…

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 16. Alberta Genuine Draft

Are you running out of beer, but don’t want to leave your home due to social distancing? Here’s the solution you’ve been looking for! Last night, I ordered some beer online from Big Rock, one of Canada’s OG craft breweries, and they delivered it — for free — right to my door!!!

OK, so this is the part when I mention that free delivery is only available in Toronto, Vancouver, Calgary and Edmonton, and they only deliver twice a week, on Wednesdays and Saturdays (in the GTA, anyways). I just happened to luck out by placing my order on a Tuesday night…

16. Alberta Genuine Draft

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Man, the last time I had this beer, I was probably in Calgary! Sure, I couldda gone with one of their other beers, like Rhinestone Cowboy or Citradelic, or the Alberta staples Grasshopper and Traditional Ale…but those beers only come in four-packs. This here’s a 15-pack, bro!!!

And, at $27.75, it’s a lot cheaper than a dozen tallboys, too! Even after adding HST, cuz this ain’t The Beer Store, it’s still just over two bucks a can. Hey, it’s not Buck a Beer, but that still ain’t bad!

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Cheers Lanny!!!

20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 15. Sam Roberts Band Ale

Now, I’m not a huge Sam Roberts Band fan — there were a couple songs on their first album that I liked, but I haven’t listened to much of them since. However, drinking their beer is probably the closest thing I’ll come to seeing Sam Roberts, or any other band, in the flesh for the next little while…

15. Sam Roberts Band Ale

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Now, this beer might be as close to an English pub ale as Sam Roberts is to Pete Shelley (RIP), but it’s still got a pretty decent finish. I pounded a couple of these at the Black Bull, a legendary Toronto dive with a massive patio…that currently sits empty, like every other bar in the city. 😦 😦 😦

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 14. Tropical Mango Pale Ale

Dude, I wish I was off on vacation somewhere on a beach, on an island in the sun…not cooped up in the Catucci Cave with nothing but takeout to tide me over! That’s why today we’re looking back at a craft brewery and brewpub straight outta the Caribbean!!!

14. Tropical Mango Pale Ale

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St. John, in the U.S. Virgin Islands, is mostly beaches, forests and national park. But not too far from the ferry dock, there’s this funky little brewpub where they’re making their own beer — and this here’s the in-house special, Tropical Mango Pale Ale. Not too heavy or too hoppy, it’s brewed with real mangoes for a nice, fruity finish. Man, I think I’m starting to forget what fresh fruit even tastes like…

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 12. Life in the Clouds

So, up to this point, we’ve been thinking about mostly lighter, summer beers — but as this shutdown cancels its second weekend, I think it’s time to start hitting the harder stuff…like this New England style double dry hopped IPA.

12. Life in the Clouds

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This hazy, hoppy, juicy brew from Collective Arts could sure drown a lotta sorrows right now, bro! Believe it or not, but the first time I had it wasn’t at some funky craft brewpub, but rather at Canoe, the fancy, 54th story restaurant offering elevated cuisine…like Kentucky fried sweetbreads in a smoky glass dome!!!

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20 BEERS BETTER THAN CORONA: 11. SeaQuench Ale

Dogfish Head might be one of the best craft breweries whose beers I’ve never, ever seen in Canada. And with Trump ‘n Trudeau shutting down all non-essential travel between our two countries, it looks like I won’t be making a south-of-the-border beer run anytime soon. So my chances of drinking this beer anytime before summertime seem pretty slim…

11. SeaQuench Ale

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This light, citrusy beer is a cross between a kolsch, a gose and a Berlinerweiss, which makes it pretty much the perfect summer slammer. I had a few of these on the rooftop patio at Blake Shelton’s bar in Nashville a couple years back — there’s no tears in this beer, bro!!!

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