Tag Archives: French food

Man, I didn’t know lambs could speak French, bro…

So, we’re hanging out at Le Baratin, this funky little French bistro on Dundas West, where they’ve got a pretty sweet deal: two courses for $48, or three for $58. And that includes anything on the menu, bro! Now, I’m always down for eating three things for less than the price of a steak, but I wasn’t sure what I wanted to order until I saw the jarret d’agneau — dude, I didn’t even know lambs spoke French, bro!!!!

This super-tender, heart in a blender, lovely, lovely lamb shank falls off the bone with a fork — no knife needed, bro! And this might be the best lamb shank I’ve had outside of Greektown, with some kidney beans, veggies and a tomato broth — looks like I’m not getting scurvy today!!!!

But it seems we’ve started this story in the middle of the page, so let’s back that track up, Jack! For starters, we scarfed down some escargot forestiere, in a garlic cream sauce, with some big ol’ mushrooms. And I gotta say, the mushrooms is what makes it. These bad boys were meaty, beaty, big AND bouncy, bro!!!!!!!!!

Now, it’s rare that we go to a French restaurant and NOT order creme brulee, but when I saw they only had orange creme brulee, I was like, no way, Jose! So, instead I went with the chocolate mousse. Nice ‘n creamy, with a little nutty aftertaste from their not-so-secret ingredient, Amaretto. Dude, I could crush a whole tub full of this mousse, bro!!!!

And hey, the beer selection ain’t bad here, with two draft beers and eight cans to choose from. While they do have Kronenbourg (but not on draft), I just went across the border with this Blanche de Chambly from Unibroue. I’m definitely no stranger to this one — it’s probably my go-to wheat beer on this side of the pond. (Weihenstephan Weizen FTW, frau!) And hey, unlike Unibroue’s much stronger beers like La Fin du Monde, you can crush these all day without puking in a garbage can, bro!!!!!!!

(Not that I’ve ever done that or anything…)

Croque Madame in a crepe?? Holy crap!!!

So we’re hanging out at Maison Selby, this funky French joint on Sherbourne. We were here a couple years back for some especially good escargot, but now it’s brunch time, and they’re about to funk it up another notch. They’re taking this classic French sandwich, la Croque Madame, and turning it into a crepe!? Shuttez le phoque up ET fetchez la vache, bro!!!!

Of course, here on Triple B, we took it up another notch by adding a side of bacon. And man, their four-dollar side of bacon is enough bacon for two people — non-citizens of Flavourtown, that is. You’ve got ham and cheese on the inside (plus some spinach at the end for some reason), two runny eggs on top, and then that bacon giving it a nice little chew. Man, I’d eat that every day of the week!!!!

Now, I really wanted to order their cocktail called Sacre Bleu, add a bacon garnish and call it Tabarnak, but it seems they were all out of the ingredients last weekend. So instead I went with a Lemonade Stand, this tart ‘n tangy lactose sour from Indie Alehouse. A glass of this Lemonade Stand costs a lot more than a quarter, though — at Maison Selby, it’s $11.25, bro!!!!!!

Cassoulet all day @ Parquet!!!

Now, we’re no strangers to duck confit here on Triple B. Dude, I’ve even had it in Iceland, bro! So when I heard that Parquet, this funky new French joint on Harbord, was serving up the duck with pork belly and beans in their cassoulet, you KNOW minus-10 degree weather wasn’t gonna keep me away from you!!!!!

But first, let me bite into these balls, bro. These potato croquettes are kinda like deep-fried poutine, stuffed with cheese curds and served with a side of gravy. At least they say they’re stuffed with cheese curds — I couldn’t taste the cheese, bro. 😦

Dude, this duck definitely doesn’t suck! Meat is fall-apart tender, skin is super crispy, you’ve got the added unctuousness of the pork belly, and a couple bites of beans — you could put that on a winter boot, and it would still taste good!!!!!

What makes this place even better is they’ve got my favourite French beer here — Loirette from Brasserie de la Pigeonelle. I’ve had this a couple times before at fancy places like Sorrel and Auberge du Pommier, and I gotta say, it’s probably one of my top five wheat beers. I don’t even mind that it’s 14 bucks a bottle, bro… I mean, it’s not like you can get it at the LCBO!

But now we’re gonna funk it up about three notches with a Rullquin from Belgium’s Gueuzerie Tilquin. This beer was formerly known as Stout Rullquin, so I was expecting something dark and chocolately — but while it’s a dark beer, it’s also 1/8 lambic, and it’s got the pruney taste of a Belgian trippel. (It’s listed at 7%, but it hit me a lot harder than that.) Just goes to show, you can’t judge a beer by its colour, bro!!!!

For dessert, your choices were apple tart, chocolate mousse or ice cream — so I had to go chocolate, bro. This looks much more like a chocolate bar, though, with a layer of chocolate cookie on the bottom, and some caramel and walnuts on top. Pretty good, but I just wish there was more of it… Don’t bring me dowwwwwn, mousse!!!

Le Petit Chef is cooking up some big flavours!!!

Now, we don’t normally go for five-course prix fixe menus on Triple B, but when I heard this one was being made tableside by a 6 cm animated chef, you KNOW I had to check it out, bro! Le Petit Chef just opened up in downtown Toronto a few months ago — they’ve already got one in Richmond Hill, Vancouver, and about 30 other places, including 12 in Germany(!), so you know it’s gotta be good, right?

So here’s the deal. Before each course, you get an animated show projected onto the table about how Le Petit Chef cooked each dish, and then they replace the animated version on the plate with the real thing. You KNOW we never eat salad on Triple B, but after I saw all the trouble this little guy went to in pulling those veggies outta the ground, I felt like it was my duty to chow down on this caprese salad, son!!!

So, what we’ve got here is some lettuce, thinly sliced radishes, two kinds of tomatoes, with a big ol’ hunka Buffalo mozzarella in the middle and these little balsamic pearls on top. I’d say this is one of my Top 5 salads of 2023 — but it’s only January and I don’t think I’ve had five salads this year, so take that for what it’s worth…

Up next, we’ve got seafood bisque with one mussel, a nice little piece of lobster and a tiny hunk of octopus that Le Petit Chef chopped off a big ol’ ock who was trying to eat him for dinner. Dude almost gave his life for this dish, so you know it’s gotta be good!!!!

At this place, you get not one, but two main courses — although they’re both pretty petite. But I gotta say, the little guy makes a mean chicken ballotine, stuffed with spinach, goat cheese and red peppers. You’ve got a couple potatoes on the side, and some demi-glace and red pepper sauce for dipping, along with a sprig of pine needles sticking out of the top. I actually saw someone eat all the pine needles — she must have really fresh breath, bro!!!!

But now it’s time for the moment de vérité — filet mignon au poivre, mec! This had to be the smaller steak we’ve ever eaten on Triple B, but it’s still a lot bigger than the guy who cooked it, so I will give him that. Nice char on the meat, with a bit of peppery taste, and the mashed parsnips really kicked it up a notch! I’m not sure I needed three spears of asparagus, though… You cuss, I cuss, we all cuss for asparagus, bro!!!!!!!!!

But even after lighting himself on fire when he was cooking the steak, the little dude really came through with dessert. Although it’s hidden under a whole buncha berries here, this creme brulee had the hardest, crunchiest shell I can ever remember breaking through… and when it comes to creme brulee, that’s a really good thing. Dude was saving the best for last, bro!!!!!

BIG APPLE BITES: The king of beef @ La Grande Boucherie

At West 53rd and 6 1/2th, just a few steps from the Late Night with Colbert studio, sits this busy French bistro, La Grande Boucherie, where the dishes might be French, but the portions are definitively American-sized. We’re talking big cuts of steak, lamb chops, pork chops… even a whole chicken. Better bring your appetite, bro!!!!

With all the fresh seafood sitting in front of me behind the counter, I couldn’t just eat meat, though. Starting off with Saint Jacques a la Provençale, seared scallops with roasted tomatoes, butter and herbs. Scallops were super fresh, nice and tender with a bit of that saltiness from the sea. Not a lot of excess sauce, but the two big chunks of bread soaked it up nicely.

But the star of the show is the roast beef au jus — you’ll find it at the top right corner of the menu. Of course, we had to go with the biggest one, Le Roi… although it’s maybe just a Medium in Flavourtown, checking in at 16 ounces.

You know how when you go to a buffet, and they only give you a small sliver of prime rib? Well, this is the opposite of that. Beef needs some of that au jus to warm it up — and there’s not enough of it to go around — but the meat is incredibly tender, and the fresh horseradish adds a nice little kick. And speaking of tender, juicy things, definitely get the side of mushrooms!

But you KNOW we’ve still got room for dessert, and I gotta try the crème brûlée, right? The classic French dessert (they also have a signature version with black sesame, but you don’t phoque with a classic, mec!) hits the spot with its crunchy caramel crust concealing the creaminess underneath. They even put a couple fresh berries on top, so I don’t die of scurvy…

We’re washing it down with a rich, malty Dunkel from Von Trapp in Vermont. Yes, they do have Kronenbourg, but for a dollar less (and still 11 bucks a pint) I will go with this bad boy instead…

Funky four-course French feast @ Jules Bistro

In 2021, I demolished a 24 oz cote de boeuf at Jules Bistro, this funky fresh French joint on Queen West. But it turns out there’s another Jules Bistro in town… only this one’s on Queen East. (They pretty much have the same menu, though.) So when I heard they were serving up a three-course prix fixe for just 40 bucks, you KNOW I had to check it out, bro!!!!!!

We’re starting off with their vegetarian French onion soup, which is more like French onion soup, with a twist. Fortunately, it’s not completely cheese-free — vegetarian, not vegan — but you won’t see a cheese crust or a crock pot, and instead of croutons, there’s a couple pieces of French bread on top. It wasn’t bad, but I prefer the more typical soupe a l’oignon like they serve at Cluny.

Now, the escargot weren’t on the prix fixe menu, but you KNOW I can’t go to a French restaurant and NOT eat snails, bro! These were not your garden-variety escargot, either, served in a brandy mushroom cream sauce with a side of toasted baguette — no garlic butter here!

Dude, this whole dinner is brought to you by cream sauce. Up next, we’ve got saute de poulet, sliced chicken breast in a bacon and mushroom cream sauce, with a side of fries and salad. Chicken is nice ‘n tender, that cream sauce is legit, but those fries are what makes it — they’re like McDonald’s without all the salt, son!!!!

And of course, we’re ending this creamy feast with some creme brulee. This tastes pretty much like I remember from the West End spot, with a nice crispy crust and a cold, creamy centre. Nothing wrong with that at all!

We’re washing it down with a cream, erm, Queen of Wheat beer from Spearhead. It’s sorta like a Belgian wit, but not as citrusy as some of the ones I’ve had before (i.e. Blanche de Chambly). Goes good with soup ‘n snails, but I switched to a Great Lakes Stout for the main course and did not regret it…

MUCH MORE MUNICH: Bohemian brunch at a funky Michelin star French joint

Now, I wanted to make sure I wasn’t watching football on an empty stomach last Sunday, so I was looking for some real-deal brunch before the big game. And about halfway from Marienplatz to Allianz Arena, on the bustling Leopoldstrasse, there’s a two-time Michelin Star joint that’s bringing the buffet to you — this is La Bohème!

For a set price of 79 Euros per person, they’re serving up a multi-course meal with all the things you see above. They do not seem to have an English menu, and I don’t know what half of these words mean…but everything they brought out was quite tasty.

We started with a cheese cracker, bruschetta, hummus in a cone, and another cone with crudités and dip. Fancy schmancy!

This spread was like a whole meal in itself (and could probably feed a table for four) with a variety of breads, meats, cheese, smoked salmon, smoked mackerel, guacamole, marmalade… Let’s just say I made a few interesting open-faced sammies out of this. Smoked fish and marmalade taste better together than you might think!

But wait, there’s more…

Now here’s an interesting take on eggs benny. It’s practically gluten-free with just a couple croutons on the side. But the egg is nicely poached, bacon is good and crispy… It’s different, but it works.

Next up, a bit of a break with Caesar salad, Avocado/raisin salad and a shrimp cocktail. Caesar was nice and creamy, shrimp was plump and tasty, and who knew that avocado and raisins went together so well???

From there, we get a lot of small but mighty plates, like rare roast beef with one sliver of potato…

This little slider was OK, but nothing special.

Mushroom risotto was strangely foamy but still quite tasty. Mushrooms were nice and tender and the rice was cooked perfectly.

More rice, and more foam, along with their catch of the day. It’s good, but I’m over it.

What I really need is some steak to pick me up — and this meat is literally on fire, bro! Beef is super tender, and that cognac glaze really sets it off!!!!

Instead of full-sized pancakes, we got a bit of an amuse bouche with these pancake balls. Unfortunately only the bottom one got any syrup, and the top one was pretty dry…

Just when it looked like I would have to skip dessert to head down to the game, I saw them preparing these crepes and decided to wait. Paper thin and citrusy with lemon and orange, it was a nice end to a very long meal. Like I said, this entire 3-hour feast — including champagne and orange juice — was 79 Euros, tax included. Maybe that’s not so great once you convert it to CAD, but for all this food, I really can’t complain… Alles gut en ze hood!

Eating, like, a horse @ La Palette

Now, you’ll find no shortage of funky French food in Toronto — Jules Bistro, Le Select, Le Papillon, Maison Close, Maison Selby, Cafe La Gaffe… just to name a few. But we’ve found this one place on Queen St West that’s pulled ahead of the competition by a nose. La Palette is not just serving up your everyday steak frites, y’see, they’ve got a secret ingredient — it’s horse, of course!!!!

Now, people mighta been pissed when they found horse meat at Burger King about 10 years ago… but if it tasted like this, they’d really have nothing to complain about. This horse tenderloin was nice ‘n tender, melts in your mouth and nicely seasoned. They say on the menu they can only cook it rare — mine came out more medium rare, which is how I like my steak anyways.

Put it this way: I would not say neigh to eating horse again!!!!

But you KNOW we can’t go to a French joint and NOT have escargot — that’s a major no-no, bro! And these were some of the most tender snails I’ve ever had, served up with plenty of garlic butter, and topped with chives and chopped peanuts. Man, I’ve never seen nuts served with this dish before. It’s pretty nuts… and nuts is good!

But you KNOW I’m still hungry like a horse after all that horse meat, so I’ve definitely still got room for dessert. And while they might have 4-5 desserts to choose from, ya know what they say — it’s gotta be crème brûlée. La Palette really nailed this dish, with the hard, crunchy crust and creamy inside. But it has gotta be the smallest crème brûlée I’ve ever seen. I’m pretty sure I’ve had ramekins of ketchup that were bigger than this! (To be fair, it’s only 5 bucks, so there’s that.)

And yes, I am that guy who goes to a French bistro and asks what beers they have on tap. Well, I asked if they had Kronenbourg — and they actually didn’t, but steered me to this Czechvar Dark Lager instead. A couple of these, and we’re back in the saddle again, Aer-bro-smith!!!!

Allez les Duck le Bleu!!!!

Now, we’re pretty big fans of French food here on Triple B, and one of the most classic French dishes is duck confit. So when I heard Joy on Avenue, this funky little joint in Yorkville, was serving up this dish called Duck le Bleu, you KNOW I had to check it out, bro!

But before we get to the duck, first let’s have some pork. Dude, this pork belly is super-tender, with cauliflower puree on the bottom and wild figs on top. I could crush at least four of these, son!

Speaking of things that come in fours, these seared scallops are super-legit! Man, after that disappointing Crouching Melon, Hidden Scallop dish I had at Chica, I was hungry like the wolf for some real-deal bivalves, and these babies definitely didn’t disappoint!

Now, usually when I see duck confit, it would be duck leg, not duck breast. But the meat here is cooked perfectly, nice ‘n juicy. And it’s served with a side of blueberry risotto, which puts the bleu in Duck le Bleu. Man, this would really go great with a Blanche de Chambly Bluet…but they don’t serve any beer at this place at all, bro. 😦 😦 😦

Bison and venison — laissez les bons temps rouler!!!!

So, we’re hanging out at Laissez Faire, this funky, laid back French place at King and Portland. They just changed their menu, so when I saw the bison carpaccio, you KNOW it was heading straight down my piehole, bro!!!

Dude, this dish is too legit to quit! It almost tastes like prosciutto, with a rich, meaty flavour, plus you’ve got little bites of cheese and mushrooms on top. There’s also some asparagus in there — or at least I think that’s why my pee smells funny, bro…

But now it’s time for the main event. This venison tenderloin puts the tender in tenderloin — you can practically pull it apart with your fork. And it comes with mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes, along with a tiny little pitcher of au jus — more than enough to go around, mind you. It looks pretty fancy, but is still fairly reasonable at $32.

Of course, you KNOW we’ve still got room for dessert, bro! Their molten lava cake is full of chocolatey goodness, while the crème brûlée is nice and creamy under the crispy crust. I would sooooo order both of these again!!!!!

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