Who needs democracy when we’re in a Beerocracy?

Now, I’ve never lived in a dictatorship…but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night. Dude, you’ve gotta be drunk to buy some of the stuff that these politicians come up with — I mean, whoever thought that Buck a Beer was a good idea??? Good thing that at Beerocracy, this funky craft beer bar on College, you won’t find any PC Brand, Barley Days or Cool Beer on the menu…

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We’re starting off on the lighter side with some Yacht Rock, a sessionable sour beer from Stone City Brewing. This gose goes down easy, at 4.4%, and comes with a hit of pink rock salt. Now, pink rock might not be punk rock, but it’s still heavier than Seals & Crofts, bro!!!

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But now we’re getting a whole lot heavier with Rainbow in the Dark, a winter rye IPA named after my third-favourite Dio song. This brew comes in at an evil 6.66%, and tastes so good, I’d even pay to drink a hologram of it… OK, maybe not.

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Now, I have heard a lot aboot Canadian Breakfast Stout, but being that it’s brewed by Founders in Grand Rapids, Michigan, and our local politicians have decided that we can only buy beer from two places, I have never had a chance to taste it until now. This super-strong (11.7%) bourbon barrel stout tasted a lot like the Trou de Diable I had at Beerbistro, but it’s even more potent… it’s so strong that they only serve it in a 12 oz glass. But that doesn’t mean you can order just one — this is a Beerocracy, after all. 😉

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Oh no, there goes Tokyo… Go, go Gosezilla!!!

So, we’re hanging out at Northern Maverick, this funky craft brewpub on Bathurst, where they’ve got eight beers brewed in house on tap, but there’s only one I wanna try…OK, make that two. They’ve actually got two different goses, which they call Gosezilla, and they’re like a funky one-two fruit punch in Flavourtown!

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Up first is the Strawberry & Pineapple Gosezilla, brewed with fresh strawberries, and a little kick of pineapple at the end. Man, who needs Booster Juice when you can slam one of these smoothies, bro???

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Aaaaaand now we’re kicking it up another notch with the Peach & Mango Gosezilla. This one is super-refreshing, with millions of peaches, peaches for me…lookout!

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Of course, with all that fruit in the beer, I don’t even need to order a salad…not like I would have anyways, bro! Instead, we’re talking fried chicken, cornbread, and coleslaw (which counts as a salad, I guess?). The craziest thing about this dish is it’s completely boneless–they just shape it to look like a breast or a thigh. And you’ve got a bit of garlic ranch and some jerk sauce on the side–dude, Jerk Sauce was the name of my Sublime cover band, bro!!!!