Tag Archives: onion rings

Holy peanut butter jalapeno bacon cheeseburger, Batman!!!

So, we’re hanging out at Allen Burger Venture, this funky little joint on Allen St, right in the heart of the cool part of Buffalo. If your favourite craft beer dive bar only played punk rock and new wave and had 14 different burgers – without counting the non-beef ones – on the menu, it would be this place. And you know me, I had to go with the funkiest of the funky bunch…this is burger number five, Lou Bro-ga!

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Now, this has gotta be the most outta-bounds burger I’ve had since I ordered the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup burger, and made mine a double! You’ve got the salty creaminess of the peanut butter, some heat from the hot peppers, a nice chewy bacon, and a thick and juicy patty – and then you throw down some white cheddar!? Shut the back door!!!

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But the funk train don’t stop there, son! These are some of the biggest, breadiest, crunchiest onion rings I’ve ever seen – and they’re beer-batted in Olde English 800, maybe the one beer I might not drink over Molson Canadian. It sure tastes good on some rings though, bro!!!!

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And when it comes to beer, there ain’t no Canadian here! (They do have Labatt Blue Light though, for some reason.) Instead, you’ve got 24 taps of local craft beer, and even more in cans! This here is Nosferatu, a bloody red ale from Great Lakes Brewing – not the one from Etobicoke, but the one in Cleveland. And rather than the bitter taste of a Crazy Canuck, this brew actually reminds me more of Arch Brewing’s Dinner Jacket O’Red IPA, which used to be my Ottawa Redblacks beer…except that they don’t make it anymore. 😦

We’re getting loaded on Drunken Chicken, bro!!!

Now, if I was to add a couple more letters to the name of this website, it would be Triple BFC. Or maybe Triple BBQFC. Cuz man, if there’s one thing I like almost as much as Burgers, Bacon and Beer, it’s fried chicken. And there’s a whole buncha funky joints from the South — we’re talkin’ South Korea, son — waaay up North, up around Yonge and Finch, that do it up right. But when I heard about this joint called Drunken Chicken, you KNOW I had to check it out. Pass me an ice-cold Sapporo, bro!!!

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Now, the deal with this place is that you can order a “half” or a “whole” chicken, either with bones or boneless, and then there’s seven different sauces and flavours to choose from. Or you can do what I did, which was get half and half — you save four bucks per order, and you get to choose two different kinds.

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So, we started with the Honey Gangjeong, which was a little underwhelming. Don’t get me wrong, this chicken was crispier than a frisky biscuit, but it just didn’t have that much sweetness to it. I was kinda expecting more from something with “honey” in the name…

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I definitely liked the Spicy Peanut more, doused in a Thai-style peanut sauce…but it was so not spicy. Normally, when I see something with a pepper next to it on the menu, it means I’ll be hitching a ride home on the Pepto-Copter, but that was definitely not the case here. Still pretty tasty though…

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Now, you KNOW I finished off two full baskets of Korean fried chicken, and still had room for dessert…if by dessert, you mean onion rings:

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This Duck Dynasty burger is cookin’ with peanut oil!

So, we’re hanging out at The Burger Cellar up on Yonge St north of Lawrence. This place is cookin’ up most of the animal kingdom, bro—you’ve got lamb burgers, bison burgers, turkey burgers…and this tribute to my favourite reality TV show, the Duck Dynasty burger:

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OK, let’s break it down. What you’ve got here is a thick, juicy, AAA Angus beef patty, with some BBQ duck confit on top. Throw down some melty cheddar cheese, crispy onions and chipotle mayo, and now you’re cookin’ with peanut oil, son! This burger is supposed to come with coleslaw on top, but coleslaw and duck go together like peanut butter and chili oil, so I got ‘em to put some crispy, deep-fried jalapenos on mine instead. I do not regret this decision…

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Now, if you’re ordering a Duck Dynasty burger, you gotta have a killer side, like crawfish gumbo, or some deep-fried boudin balls or something. But you can’t get that shit up in Toronto, so I settled for some beer-battered onion rings. Can’t say I’m disappointed—these rings are super-crispy, fried-to-perfection, shut-the-back-door, bro! Next time, I might go for the duck poutine, though…

Wahlburgers’ turkey club is a wicked hahd slapshaat to the taste buds!

So, I haven’t really been watching much hockey this month cuz no Canadian teams are in the playoffs. You know who else isn’t in the playoffs this year? Boston. Mark Wahlberg would surely be disappointed if he wasn’t busy filming Transformers 7 somewhere deep in the heart of Hamilton.

OK, so I don’t think they’ve started filming that one yet. But a few of Marky Mark’s funky films were made in TO, which is why we’ve also got the only Wahlburgers outside of America. There’s even one at Pearson airport now, but I ain’t flying to the Stanley Cup Finals this year… so I took off to the one downtown, where I had this massive slab of Milan Lucic-approved turkey:

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Doesn’t it look just like him? You’ve got not one, but two patties of lean ground turkey, topped with bacon, white cheddar, lettuce, tomato and both salsa and guacamole. It’s like a fiesta in a bun, bro! Only thing is, there was nothing holding the two patties together, so they were slip-sliding all over the place. I needed like eleventy napkins when I was eating this! But wait, that’s not all…

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These super-stringy onion ringies are Chuck Swirsky approved. All that’s missing is the salami and cheese. Which would actually make a nice appetizer, dontcha think?