Tag Archives: Royal Meats

FLAVOURTOWN OLYMPICS: This Juicy Lucy is for Johnny Shusty!!!

They’re already calling it the Miracle on Ice 2018–so says the Canadian curling commentators, anyways. A couple years back, 10 guys tried out for the U.S. National Curling Team, four guys got cut…and then they formed their own Team of Rejects, beat the other two teams and made it to the Olympics. But this story’s just getting started, son!

After losing four of their first six games, Team USA reels off six in a row, beating Canada not once, but twice, and defeating Team Sweden for their country’s first ever gold medal in curling. Dude, that’s so gangster, it’s like that time when 3rd Bass beat down Henry Rollins, bro! In honour of John Shuster and the rink from Duluth Curling Club, I’m about to throw down one of Minnesota’s greatest culinary creations, the Juicy Lucy burger:

royal_deluxe_burger (9)

OK, I’ve never been to the 5-8 Club or Matt’s Bar in Minneapolis, so the best cheese-stuffed cheeseburger I’ve ever had was at Royal Meats, this massive meat palace just a raised double takeout away from the Rogers Centre. They call it the Royal Deluxe, and they don’t just put beef in this burger–it’s got pork, it’s got veal, and then it’s stuffed with ham and goat cheese, bro! I’m gonna hurry, hurry hard this one straight to the button…and by the button, I mean straight down my piehole!!!

READ MORE: It’s a pig, cow and goat burger, bro!!!!

It’s a pig, cow and goat burger, bro!!!!

So, we’re hanging out at Royal Meats, just a Darwin Barney grounder away from Rogers Centre on Fort York Blvd. Now, today is officially Hamburger Day, so you know I gotta get something between two buns, son! But I can’t just have any regular old burger–I gotta go with something so outta bounds, it bounces off the foul pole…this is the Royal Deluxe with Cheese:

royal_deluxe_burger (9)

OK, so here’s the deal. They take two burger patties, which are made from a mixture of ground pork and veal, put some ham and goat cheese in between, and roll it all up like a Juicy Lucy doobie doobie doo! Only I ain’t gonna smoke this shit–I’m gonna shove it straight down my piehole! The cheese is warm and creamy, you’ve got a nice crust on the meat, and then lettuce, tomatoes and pickles to cool it down. This was definitely the messiest burger I’ve had in a while–I even got some hot cheese on my arm–but man, did it ever hit the spot! Happy Burger Day, brosephs and bro-settes!!!

birthday burger