EATIN AUSTIN: I don’t always eat boneless wings, but when I do, I make sure they’re wrapped in bacon!

So, we’re hanging out at The Tavern, this funky neighbourhood bar that’s been down on the corner of 12th Street and Lamar for more than 100 years. When my righteous brosephs at The Thrillest said they had the best damn chicken wings in Texas, I knew I had to check this place out–but these ain’t yer grandpappy’s chicken wings, son!

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They call these the Amazing White Wings, and they’re pretty baller to the max! You’ve got boneless chicken, stuffed with jalapeños, wrapped in bacon, and tossed with wing sauce, dude! Then there’s carrots and celery sticks on the side, some crispy fried onions, and both ranch and blue cheese dressing, bro!

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The chicken is nice ‘n juicy, you’ve got a nice little kick from the hot peppers and the wing sauce, and then the bacon just wraps it all up in a nice little meat sweater. Who needs bones when you’ve got bacon, bro!!!??? (Man, I gotta put that on a t-shirt or something!)

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Heading straight down to Japanese Skewertown!

Now, when it comes to Japanese, I’ve had my share of sushi, teriyaki, katsu and izakaya, but yakitori was new to me. So basically, it’s a charcoal-grilled shish kabob, and they grill ‘em all at Kintori Yakitori, this funky little joint on top of a ramen restaurant in Little Korea.

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Now, this place has just about every kind of meat you can imagine—pork belly, duck breast, beef tongue and whole squid, just to name a few. But whether it’s belly, cheek or chicken, they serve ‘em up the same way—no marinade, no seasoning, just straight to the grill, bro! The skewers cost a couple bucks a pop, and I could probably eat 23 of these…but I didn’t, cuz that would cost a pretty penny. But not everything at Kintori comes on a stick, though:

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Now, what’s better than a deep-fried chicken wing? A deep-fried chicken wing stuffed with a dim sum dumpling, son! This dish was super-crispy, chicken was tender, and then you get hit with pork dumpling smack dab in the middle! I dunno how they do it, but I could easily eat seven of these and still have room for dessert!

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They call this yaki onigiri, which is not as sweet as it sounds. They take a ball of rice, put some teriyaki plum stuff on the inside, and grill it until the bottom is burned. I guess it’s an acquired taste. Hey man, I’ll try anything once—as long as it’s not vegan—but gimme a nice, crispy, deep-fried Mars bar any day!