Tag Archives: Top 5 Food Cities

Top 5 Food Cities: 1. Seattle

Not only is Seattle home to my favourite NFL football team (Go Hawks!), but it’s also got some of my fav food joints, as well. Sure, there’s Pike Place Fish Market and some of the freshest clam chowder, calamari and fish ‘n chips you’ll find all over this country. But you can also get all kinds of good stuff here, from deep-fried candied bacon, to a breakfast burrito served Christmas style, to a chicken-fried steak as big as your head. (I actually finished it, too, but that joint was too dark for me to take a picture, bro!) If I had a green card, I would totally move to Belltown, get Seahawks season tickets and eat my weight in seafood every month… Hey, a food dude can dream, can’t he?

ivars_chowder

ivars_fish_n_chips

Ivar’s Fish ‘n Chips is the real deal. Right on the waterfront, they’re serving up some righteous clam chowder and out-of-bounds fish ‘n chips for Happy Hour!

fish_tacos

Not to be outdone, these Pacific King Salmon tacos at Pike Place were one of the best fish dishes I’ve ever had.

calamari

fish_burger

Just a Russell Wilson spiral away from the stadium, the Pyramid Alehouse serves up some killer calamari and righteous fish burgers in its own right.

smokin_hot_bitch

So, this funky southern-style breakfast joint just opened up in Belltown about a year ago. They call this the Smokin’ Hot Bitch: Biscuit and Gravy smothered in cheese and topped with a grilled Louisiana Hot Link & jalapenos. I call it magically delicious!

breakfast_burrito

See, I wasn’t kiddin’ about the breakfast burrito, bro!

Top 5 Food Cities: 2. Austin

So, here’s my Keep Austin Weird story, bro. I was at this heavy metal horror movie convention, and I walked across the street to this funky coffee shop that also serves booze and has a real-deal BBQ food truck in its backyard. I was wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt and they were playing Iron Maiden on the stereo, which was totally awesome. The bartenderista tells me they’ve been playing Maiden all day, and Number of the Beast is up next. I’m like “Dude, that’s my favourite album!” and he gives me a free beer. I totally wanted to move to Austin the next day.

Man, this place has everything; breakfast tacos, fried chicken ‘n waffles, legit BBQ, real-deal Mexican… Even the food at the airport doesn’t suck!

breakfast_migas

They call these breakfast migas, which is Texican for scrambled eggs and fried tortillas.

breakfast_tacos

You can get breakfast tacos pretty much anywhere in Austin, and they’re super-cheap, too!

chicken_n_waffles (1)

If you don’t eat so much for brunch that you don’t have room for dinner, you’re doing it wrong, dude…

green_chili

Bro, this green chili sauce is even better than Guy Fieri’s! I would so put it on a flip-flop!

Top 5 Food Cities: 4. Las Vegas

Check out my latest Vegas adventure!

Like they say, what happens in Vegas makes you 20 pounds heavier. You can pretty much find every kind of food you can imagine, not to mention some of the best buffets in the known universe. I once ate so much I almost pulled a George Brett on the monorail. I mean, uh, I almost saw some other guy pull a George Brett on the monorail…

Anyhoo, when I hit up Sin City, I drop so much on food that I don’t have enough money left to gamble, bro! Whether it’s German schnitzel, fish tacos, Irish nachos or Bud Light Limearita in a mason jar, I don’t go home hungry, that’s for sure. I even survived the Heart Attack Grill!

hofbrau_vegas

This German beerhall used to be right across the street from the KISS mini golf course—until KISS moved it to the Rio.

chicken_schnitzel

But who needs KISS when you’ve got chicken schnitzel, bro!?

vegas_breakfast

When I’m in Vegas, I like to start my day off right—with a deep-fried ham ‘n egg French toast sandwich.

toby_keiths_bar

Where else are you gonna get a real-deal Rueben at a country bar in a casino, bro?

irish_nachos

If you can believe it, this is the small order of Irish nachos. The XL could probably feed a whole hurling team!

Top 5 Food Cities: 4. New York City

For me, NYC is all about the burgers, baby! 5 Napkins, 67 Burger, Smith & Wollensky’s…this city has some Bomb.Com beef, bro. Sure, you can get other fancy food, like a $25 fried chicken in Brooklyn, a $20 pastrami sammy at the Carnegie Deli, or a $15 shrimp po’ boy at Bubba Gump’s (only 1020 calories!), but when I’m here, I’m eating burgers, son. Unless of course I’m eating at Guy Fieri’s funky joint in Times Square!

5_napkin_fries

Hell’s Kitchen used to be pretty dangerous, but now, the only thing you gotta worry about is whether you can get a table at 5 Napkin Burger!

67_burger

67 Burger lets you pick between beef, turkey, chicken, veggie and tofu patties. But really, why would you choose anything but beef, bro?

wollensky_burger

Dude, the Wollensky burger at Smith & Wollensky is big enough to feed a whole team of Dash Riprocks!

carnegie_deli_sandwich

Believe it or not, I actually ate this for breakfast…

Top 5 Food Cities: 5. Ottawa

Don’t get me wrong bro, I’ve had some awful food in Ottawa. There was this shitty $20 steak sandwich at Canadian Tire Centre that was so pukealicious I wanted to go back to the kitchen and slap the cook for making it, then go up to the luxury box and slap the owner for charging 20 bucks for it. But if I’d done that, Ida probably missed the first period, so…

While so much of the chow in Canada’s capital is completely craptacular, that only makes the hidden gems taste even better when you find ‘em. Whether it’s a real-deal Alberta beef burger on Elgin Street, off-the-hook fish ‘n chips in a strip mall, or TheBomb.ca lobster poutine in Kanata, there is some great grub if you know where to look. They even have a Real Sports Bar!

john_a_pub_burger

I may not be a Liberal-Conservative, but I would vote for the Sir John A Pub’s prime rib burger any day!

roast_beef_dinner

After seeing the Stamps stomp the shit outta the REDBLACKS a couple years back, I settled in for a killer roast-beef Sunday dinner at The Lieutenant’s Pump. All this food for $14.95, dude!

Ottawa_lobster_poutine

Before getting on the bus to an AC/DC concert at TD Place, I stopped by this funky German beer hall in Kanata, where I had probably the greatest lobster poutine of all time. This dish shook me all night long!

Come back tomorrow to find out who’s number four…