Tag Archives: Toronto Blue Jays

I’m gonna crush these beers like Bo crushes Yankees pitchers, bro!!!

So, we’re hanging out at Rogers Centre, where the Jays are locked into an epic series against the New York Yankees. Last night, my homeboy Bo Bichette went off, with three hits and two homers, including the game-winning blast in the bottom of the eighth. And now we’re back at the ballpark for some footlong franks and victory beers, bro!!!

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What could be better than meat in tube form? How about 12 inches of meat, son!!! This footlong hotdog is so big, it doesn’t even fit into the bun! However, they got rid of the self-service condiment station, and only gave out packets of ketchup, relish and mustard (which I couldn’t open, for some reason)…but that doesn’t make this dugout dog any less delicious!

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Fries were warm and crunchy at the bottom, but the ones up top were cold and soggy. That’s not to say I didn’t eat every last one, son!!!!

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And when it comes to beer, the only options here were Budweiser, Bud Light or Stella Artois. Part of me wasn’t sure it was worth paying two dollars more for Stella…but I don’t think any part of me thinks it’s worth paying anything for Bud Light, so the choice was obvious. 😛

TORONTO’S TOP TAKEOUT: Sucking on chili dogs at the back of Fancy Franks…

Today is Opening Day for the Blue Jays…although they were in New York today, and will play their “home games” in Florida until at least the end of May. Since it looks like we won’t be heading down to the ballpark anytime soon, we’re bringing the ballpark home with some real-deal Coney Island chili dogs from Francy Franks.

Suck on THIS chili dog, John Bro-gar Bro-llencamp! We’ve got a 100% beef wiener topped with meaty chili, chopped onions and mustard in a warm ‘n toasty bun. And you KNOW I didn’t eat just one, bro!!!

But that’s not all, folks! We’re kicking things up another notch with some chili poutine! This dish is like Chili Cheese Fries Gone Wild — with real-deal cheese curds to top it off. There is even some gravy on here, but it mostly either absorbed into the meat or settled at the bottom. And hey, this dish actually held up OK in delivery!

Now, we won’t have the CN Tower in the background on Opening Day, so instead we’re drinking a beer with the CN Tower on it — Divercity Helles Lager from Lost Craft. And hey, the Jays actually came back in extra innings to beat the Yanks!!!! Can I get a Helles Yeah, bro????

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Gone Country @ the ballpark with a pulled pork, cheese curd, waffle sammy!!!

Yesterday was Country Day at the Rogers Centre, which means I showed up bright and early…at 2 pm. You had a plaid-sleeved, long-sleeve Blue Jays t-shirt giveaway, my Alberta bros in High Valley bustin’ out some Alan Jackson and Joe Diffie tunes, and all the cheerleaders were dressed up like rootin’, tootin’ cowgirls. For a minute there, I almost forgot I was in Toronto!

Of course, I wasn’t just there to hoedown, bro! When I heard they were serving up some new culinary creations for the 2018 season, you KNOW I was gonna dive right in. And while the beef brisket sandwich and the Korean BBQ tacos sounded tasty, I knew there was only one Flavourtown rockstar headed straight down my piehole–the Log Cabin Sandwich:

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This gay Republican’s wet dream comes fully loaded with pulled pork, baked beans and cheese curds on a savoury rosemary waffle. Now, the waffle was nice and fluffy, and the pulled pork was on point…but the beans had no flavour and the cheese curds were cold as ice, ice baby. There was no gravy or sauce on this sammy, but once the pulled pork warmed the cheese up a bit, it came together pretty good. So, I wouldn’t call this dish a home run, but it was more like a Teoscar Hernandez triple off the top of the wall, maybe?

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Of course, after pounding all that pork, you KNOW I still had room for dessert, bro! Now, this churro poutine has about as much in common with actual poutine as Guy Fieri does with Guy Lafleur…but if you wanna slam six churros with a scoop of ice cream, you definitely can’t go wrong here!