Tag Archives: turkey wings

Ain’t no thing but a turkey wing!!!

Now, I’ll admit that I’m not really the biggest Thanksgiving fan. I don’t normally like turkey unless it’s been dry-rubbed and smoked, bro! But when I saw these frickin yuuuge turkey wings at Longo’s, I figured I’d give ’em a shot. I had done Buffalo turkey wings a little while back–but those were drums and flats. This not-so-little wing is about the size of a dinner plate:

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So, I smothered this bad boy in Diana’s Gourmet Original BBQ Sauce, then chucked ‘er in the oven for half an hour at 425. I gotta say, getting through this monstrosity was pretty tricky. I needed to use a fork and knife for some parts, and bite through other bits with my teeth. But I definitely got ‘r done, son–and I still had room for dessert! Too bad I didn’t have any leftover pumpkin pie…

Buffalo-style Thanksgiving with Fieri sauce, son!

Now, for me, a pound of Buffalo wings is just a light snack, but when I came across these turkey wings at the grocery store, I figured I wouldn’t hafta pound as many to be fully in my belly. And dude, Longo’s was selling these in pairs for less than two bucks a pop, so you know I had to go all Eddie Money and take some home tonight!

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Now, this picture isn’t as zoomed in as you think–these wings are like chicken wings on steroids, son! I was wondering how long to cook ’em; some sites said a couple hours at 350, but I wouldn’t even spend a couple hours watching Metallica in concert, so I turned the heat up to 425 and put ’em in for 20 minutes a side:

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But of course, it isn’t Buffalo without the wing sauce. And there’s only one wing sauce this side of the Anchor Bar that’s heading straight down my piehole, dude. I could literally eat this stuff off a flip-flop…but hey, it’s winter boot season, bro!

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After tossing the wings in the sauce in a metal bowl, I threw ’em down with some jalapeno pita chips and an ice-cold Landshark Lager, the really-just-a-dolphin of beers:

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Now, this meal was so outta bounds, it was wider right than Scott Norwood! The wings were super-tender, nice kick from the sauce, and the chips were crunchalicious…although even less spicy than a Wendy’s chicken sandwich. But who needs spicy chips with spicy wings, anyways?

Well OK, this guy does. Next time, I’ll hafta get Miss Vicky’s instead!